Sunday, February 14, 2010
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Be Ye Transformed: My Journey as a Physician
My career in family medicine has evolved from my faith, values, and desire to live creatively in the service of others. My medical education is an on-going and awe inspiring journey. During the first half of medical school, I studied the fascinating and complex human body. We began with gross anatomy by dissecting the organs, muscles, nerves and vessels to appreciate how they all fit together. We progressively went deeper into the study of these structures on a microscopic, functional and systems level. We delved into the connection of the mind and body, as well as the intricate interrelationship of every human being with our genes, environment and each other. The second half of medical school we focused largely on the biomedical model to explain what can go wrong with the body and mind, as well as what drugs, technology and surgery can be used to treat the problem.
After medical school I chose to pursue training in family medicine because, quite honestly, I loved it all. I wanted to be a healer in the true sense of the word. During my residency training, however, my ideals clashed with the harsh realities of modern medicine. I discovered that much of what we do as doctors is putting band-aids over problems. We “sweep the problem under the drug.” Furthermore, I was frustrated by a medical system that has become dominated by the big money in pharmaceutical drugs, technology and invasive surgical procedures. I recognized that while this is certainly life-saving in many instances, the current system often falls short of the needs and expectations of both doctor and patient alike.
My medical training and practice has been a humbling process. I have gained an ever increasing appreciation for the incomprehensibly complex nature of human beings. This understanding brings an acute awareness of the short comings of the traditional, biomedical model that I was taught in medical school. After completion of my residency program, I began to study the wellness movement. I now read extensively on complementary modalities and regularly attend educational conferences on holistic medicine. My practice of medicine has made it clear to me that our diseases do not fit into neat little boxes. We are spiritual beings shaped by our unique genetic, social, environmental, physical and psychological backgrounds. We cannot be healed simply by swallowing designer drugs. Education, awareness and spiritual growth, along with unconditional love prove to be the way to true healing.
My journey as a physician is inextricably linked to my own spiritual journey. The religion I was taught as a child at my Catholic grade school seemed to be based on dogma, fear, and guilt. During my adolescence I went through a process of rebellion. I was analytical and skeptical. I discarded all of the dogma that I was taught as a child. I rejected the notion of faith in organized religion. In fact, I questioned if Jesus of Nazareth was even a historical person or merely a mythical figure. I found the existence of other major world religions, and the differences within Christianity to be particularly problematic. Christianity was a large, jagged pill that I just could not swallow.
I left college resigned to the belief that we cannot know the Truth. My Christian education, however, did leave me with a sense of moral duty to lead an ethical life and to serve others. I followed my passion for science and my desire to help others and enrolled in a Jesuit medical school, Loyola University of Chicago. Surprisingly, despite attending a Jesuit college and medical school I never read much of the Bible. I held a strong mistrust of history and I rejected the idea of human beings being born sinful. I was perplexed and angry at a God who would design a universe that included so much suffering as a necessary evil.
After medical school I moved to Asheville, NC to complete my residency training. By my late twenties I was a wife and a mother of a young daughter. My medical training was physically exhausting, spiritually depleting and all-consuming. I continued to hunger for a sense of connection with something larger than myself. I looked for answers in Buddhism, Taoism, Mysticism, and Existentialism. I tried to settle into an inclusive world view, one that acknowledges the wisdom of all religious traditions, a “One River, Many Wells” philosophy. Yet, this world view was not entirely emotionally, intellectually or spiritually satisfying.
After my residency I took a position as a staff physician at a community health center in Hendersonville, NC. It was my first real job as a doctor. I was naïve and wanted to change the world. I had unrealistic hopes of somehow helping people to heal their situation. I wanted to connect with my patients on a spiritual level, but at the time, I had no clue how to do so. I became burned out in a short two years. Ironically, I found myself struggling with physical and emotional symptoms related to stress. I should have been on top of the world. I was a young, healthy, physician with a loving husband, precious baby daughter, beautiful home, and a new career. I thought that I could “fix” my mood, if only I could find a practical solution to the philosophical problems I was facing in my medical career. I spent over a year designing my ideal practice using holistic medicine approaches in a spa-like setting. I even hired consultants and was talking to bankers about financing for my dream. The whole thing was overwhelming. I was lost.
In December of 2006 I got an unexpected phone call from my good friend and fellow family physician, Michele Thompson. She asked me to move to Blairsville, GA and start a medical practice with her. My husband and I took a leap of faith, and jumped on the opportunity. A few months after our move to Georgia, I attended a Christmas Concert at the First Baptist Church in Blairsville to see Michele’s husband sing. At the end of the performance, the pastor, Fred Lodge, asked us to take a moment to ask Jesus to come into our lives. I was moved to do so with an open and hopeful heart. My life has not been the same. The change was not instantaneous. There were no angels or a beam of light coming down from Heaven. Yet, at that moment, I was no longer angry with God for being absent from my life. I realized that this was the first time that I earnestly repented my sins and asked Jesus to live through me.
The year after I accepted Christ as my Savior was rocky. I had lots of doubts, psychological pains and emotional struggles, but I persisted in prayer, and kept asking God to reveal Himself to me in Truth. I also read the Bible frequently, and started to piece together the history of God’s People, and the beautiful connection between the Old and New Testament. I read numerous other popular Christian books including, The Purpose Driven Life, The Case for Christ, and Classic Christianity, to name just a few. Old ideas fell away, and my worldview shifted. I got involved with a ministry called Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS). I enrolled my children in Sunday school, Mission Friends, choir and Vacation Bible School. I attended Church regularly and listened to praise and worship music. In short, I immersed myself in the body of Christ.
On March 29, 2009 I recognized that I was born again as a Christian. It happened during a Celebration of the Passover at the First Baptist Church. I did not anticipate it. Words fail me when I attempt to describe it. In the months prior, I had been studying the Old Testament and the Passover story. As we went through the process of breaking the bread and drinking the wine, I understood God speaking to me through the body and blood of Jesus Christ. I felt an indescribable sense of being washed clean. I felt freed from the nagging doubts that separated me from the peace of Christ. I felt a sense of community and connection that I had previously never experienced. I felt at home. God spoke to me in a way that confirmed He was my Creator. The Holy Spirit spoke to me through history, symbolism, art, beauty, love, mercy, forgiveness, grace, compassion, truth, purity, patience, wisdom, comfort and peace. The following week I publicly professed Jesus Christ as my Savior, and in May 2009 I was baptized.
I am now painfully and acutely aware of all the sinful ways that kept me from walking with the Lord sooner, namely arrogance, elitism, foolishness, pessimism, pride and fear. My heart was hard and skeptical from years of academia and the influence of worldly principles. I thought that I had to figure out all the answers for myself! I now listen to God’s command to “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding…” Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV.
A short time ago, I was unable to fathom the concept of faith. Now I cherish my faith as one of the most precious gifts in my life. The study of God’s Word allows me to experience deeper, more meaningful and fruitful relationships with my husband, children, friends and family. My practice as a doctor has been transformed as well. I used to struggle daily with feelings of resentment about the demands of my work. Now I know that God has called me to do my work, and it brings me great peace, joy and fulfillment. “I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13 AKJV. I feel privileged to do the work that I do, and I enjoy the great responsibility that God has given me to minister to my patients. I believe that my highest calling as a physician is to point others toward Jesus Christ, the Great Physician.
Cynthia J. Libert, M.D. 9/25/09
“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.” ~Romans 12:2
After medical school I chose to pursue training in family medicine because, quite honestly, I loved it all. I wanted to be a healer in the true sense of the word. During my residency training, however, my ideals clashed with the harsh realities of modern medicine. I discovered that much of what we do as doctors is putting band-aids over problems. We “sweep the problem under the drug.” Furthermore, I was frustrated by a medical system that has become dominated by the big money in pharmaceutical drugs, technology and invasive surgical procedures. I recognized that while this is certainly life-saving in many instances, the current system often falls short of the needs and expectations of both doctor and patient alike.
My medical training and practice has been a humbling process. I have gained an ever increasing appreciation for the incomprehensibly complex nature of human beings. This understanding brings an acute awareness of the short comings of the traditional, biomedical model that I was taught in medical school. After completion of my residency program, I began to study the wellness movement. I now read extensively on complementary modalities and regularly attend educational conferences on holistic medicine. My practice of medicine has made it clear to me that our diseases do not fit into neat little boxes. We are spiritual beings shaped by our unique genetic, social, environmental, physical and psychological backgrounds. We cannot be healed simply by swallowing designer drugs. Education, awareness and spiritual growth, along with unconditional love prove to be the way to true healing.
My journey as a physician is inextricably linked to my own spiritual journey. The religion I was taught as a child at my Catholic grade school seemed to be based on dogma, fear, and guilt. During my adolescence I went through a process of rebellion. I was analytical and skeptical. I discarded all of the dogma that I was taught as a child. I rejected the notion of faith in organized religion. In fact, I questioned if Jesus of Nazareth was even a historical person or merely a mythical figure. I found the existence of other major world religions, and the differences within Christianity to be particularly problematic. Christianity was a large, jagged pill that I just could not swallow.
I left college resigned to the belief that we cannot know the Truth. My Christian education, however, did leave me with a sense of moral duty to lead an ethical life and to serve others. I followed my passion for science and my desire to help others and enrolled in a Jesuit medical school, Loyola University of Chicago. Surprisingly, despite attending a Jesuit college and medical school I never read much of the Bible. I held a strong mistrust of history and I rejected the idea of human beings being born sinful. I was perplexed and angry at a God who would design a universe that included so much suffering as a necessary evil.
After medical school I moved to Asheville, NC to complete my residency training. By my late twenties I was a wife and a mother of a young daughter. My medical training was physically exhausting, spiritually depleting and all-consuming. I continued to hunger for a sense of connection with something larger than myself. I looked for answers in Buddhism, Taoism, Mysticism, and Existentialism. I tried to settle into an inclusive world view, one that acknowledges the wisdom of all religious traditions, a “One River, Many Wells” philosophy. Yet, this world view was not entirely emotionally, intellectually or spiritually satisfying.
After my residency I took a position as a staff physician at a community health center in Hendersonville, NC. It was my first real job as a doctor. I was naïve and wanted to change the world. I had unrealistic hopes of somehow helping people to heal their situation. I wanted to connect with my patients on a spiritual level, but at the time, I had no clue how to do so. I became burned out in a short two years. Ironically, I found myself struggling with physical and emotional symptoms related to stress. I should have been on top of the world. I was a young, healthy, physician with a loving husband, precious baby daughter, beautiful home, and a new career. I thought that I could “fix” my mood, if only I could find a practical solution to the philosophical problems I was facing in my medical career. I spent over a year designing my ideal practice using holistic medicine approaches in a spa-like setting. I even hired consultants and was talking to bankers about financing for my dream. The whole thing was overwhelming. I was lost.
In December of 2006 I got an unexpected phone call from my good friend and fellow family physician, Michele Thompson. She asked me to move to Blairsville, GA and start a medical practice with her. My husband and I took a leap of faith, and jumped on the opportunity. A few months after our move to Georgia, I attended a Christmas Concert at the First Baptist Church in Blairsville to see Michele’s husband sing. At the end of the performance, the pastor, Fred Lodge, asked us to take a moment to ask Jesus to come into our lives. I was moved to do so with an open and hopeful heart. My life has not been the same. The change was not instantaneous. There were no angels or a beam of light coming down from Heaven. Yet, at that moment, I was no longer angry with God for being absent from my life. I realized that this was the first time that I earnestly repented my sins and asked Jesus to live through me.
The year after I accepted Christ as my Savior was rocky. I had lots of doubts, psychological pains and emotional struggles, but I persisted in prayer, and kept asking God to reveal Himself to me in Truth. I also read the Bible frequently, and started to piece together the history of God’s People, and the beautiful connection between the Old and New Testament. I read numerous other popular Christian books including, The Purpose Driven Life, The Case for Christ, and Classic Christianity, to name just a few. Old ideas fell away, and my worldview shifted. I got involved with a ministry called Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS). I enrolled my children in Sunday school, Mission Friends, choir and Vacation Bible School. I attended Church regularly and listened to praise and worship music. In short, I immersed myself in the body of Christ.
On March 29, 2009 I recognized that I was born again as a Christian. It happened during a Celebration of the Passover at the First Baptist Church. I did not anticipate it. Words fail me when I attempt to describe it. In the months prior, I had been studying the Old Testament and the Passover story. As we went through the process of breaking the bread and drinking the wine, I understood God speaking to me through the body and blood of Jesus Christ. I felt an indescribable sense of being washed clean. I felt freed from the nagging doubts that separated me from the peace of Christ. I felt a sense of community and connection that I had previously never experienced. I felt at home. God spoke to me in a way that confirmed He was my Creator. The Holy Spirit spoke to me through history, symbolism, art, beauty, love, mercy, forgiveness, grace, compassion, truth, purity, patience, wisdom, comfort and peace. The following week I publicly professed Jesus Christ as my Savior, and in May 2009 I was baptized.
I am now painfully and acutely aware of all the sinful ways that kept me from walking with the Lord sooner, namely arrogance, elitism, foolishness, pessimism, pride and fear. My heart was hard and skeptical from years of academia and the influence of worldly principles. I thought that I had to figure out all the answers for myself! I now listen to God’s command to “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding…” Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV.
A short time ago, I was unable to fathom the concept of faith. Now I cherish my faith as one of the most precious gifts in my life. The study of God’s Word allows me to experience deeper, more meaningful and fruitful relationships with my husband, children, friends and family. My practice as a doctor has been transformed as well. I used to struggle daily with feelings of resentment about the demands of my work. Now I know that God has called me to do my work, and it brings me great peace, joy and fulfillment. “I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13 AKJV. I feel privileged to do the work that I do, and I enjoy the great responsibility that God has given me to minister to my patients. I believe that my highest calling as a physician is to point others toward Jesus Christ, the Great Physician.
Cynthia J. Libert, M.D. 9/25/09
“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.” ~Romans 12:2
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